Where's Yia yia?

So this past weekend on Sunday we celebrated my mom's birthday (today) by having my dad, brother and sister-n-law over for a lunch of all my mom's favorite things (if you remember from last year, it's all "nice" a nice salad, a nice ham, etc.). This year mom would be the big 6 - 0. December and January can be such an emotional roller coaster - joyful because of all that we are blessed with, the season, the charity, Jesus, our family, warm fires, gifts, traditions, you name it there is so much to embrace and enjoy during this time of the year. Every so often though, melancholy sets in and I think of mom not being present for all this joy. Sure I know she's here inside me and my family, but I can't help but sometimes want her HERE sitting next to me sipping on some hot cocoa. Not to be a total drag, so back to lunch. We started doing this meal last year and it's a tradition I hope to continue until I'm not here anymore. I mean I can't exactly "celebrate" someones death, so I prefer to celebrate her life - and what better day than her birthday. I'd like to say we spend the whole time talking about mom, but I think even after two years it's still a bit fresh for us and lets be honest my dad and brother are quintessential men and aren't big ones for "discussing their feelings. " So we do what we do best, laugh and joke and think of some of the ridiculous things mom did, like the time that Dad ordered her a banana cream pie (her favorite) from Baker's Square (formerly Poppin' Fresh and mom never did get over the name change) and they picked it up and it was lemon meringue. Holy shit-fits batman, mom threw a toddler sized tandrum and carried on about how all she wanted was a banana cream pie for her birthday and off they all went to exchange pies. Mom didn't take food lightly.

All last week we kept telling the kids Silly Papa is coming down and he's going to babysit you and then we're going to celebrate Yia yia's birthday. Penny really gets into birthdays - "birfday, at my house?" "a birfday?" I think she thought Yia yia would finally show up. I mean we talk about her all the time, we have pictures of her - but in her little brain I think she thinks - "where is this elusive yia yia?" I confirmed that when she said, "where yia yia?" When I was setting the table on Sunday. It's kind of cute and sad all at once. It is one of the things that breaks my heart the most besides just wanting to talk to her about nothing from time to time. So in honor of my mom, I say Happy Birthday to you - I love you, I miss you and you are never, ever far from our thoughts!

The best part about this picture (other than my mom's killer fro and the adorable 15 month old me that she is holding) is what she wrote on the back: "Christmas 1977, aren't I glamorous." Yes mom, you were!

Thanks!